tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-71799026785211375732024-03-05T22:41:14.144-05:00TheNewMeTheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-3957130145862874322022-01-04T10:06:00.001-05:002022-01-04T10:06:07.638-05:00New Start<p><br /></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">As a coach I am owning my path so I am restarting my journey today with renewed commitment and regained confidence. We all have the power to succeed or fail. But where you may see failure, I see great triumph because that means education. </span><span style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; transition-property: none !important; white-space: pre-wrap;"><a class="oajrlxb2 g5ia77u1 qu0x051f esr5mh6w e9989ue4 r7d6kgcz rq0escxv nhd2j8a9 nc684nl6 p7hjln8o kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x jb3vyjys rz4wbd8a qt6c0cv9 a8nywdso i1ao9s8h esuyzwwr f1sip0of lzcic4wl gpro0wi8 q66pz984 b1v8xokw" href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/optaviastrong?__eep__=6&__cft__[0]=AZWvkO9b7pbiM1htsU5Nr1mTNtlcaJ2xXPvMu0QzAN2UgCLO-Z8qzSAvUrvg5WrcnARAskhtlF96N-_CsmVFCM-QHINQRrpxoPzwuTLbSkn75jEVbyOHtSmgwufKHzvOP5o&__tn__=*NK-R" role="link" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; animation-name: none !important; background-color: transparent; border-color: initial; border-style: initial; border-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; display: inline; font-family: inherit; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0px; text-align: inherit; text-decoration-line: none; touch-action: manipulation; transition-property: none !important;" tabindex="0">#optaviastrong</a> Here is my Facebook post thread telling more: </span><a href="<iframe src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fpermalink.php%3Fstory_fbid%3D116905467514730%26id%3D100075858309800&show_text=true&width=500" width="500" height="454" style="border:none;overflow:hidden" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="true" allow="autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; picture-in-picture; web-share"></iframe>" target="_blank">New Start</a></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-76190426573609392902021-05-20T21:20:00.004-04:002021-05-20T21:20:43.334-04:00Not feeling like myself this week <p> Well I haven’t really felt like myself this week. Depression has seemed to come back; not full-scale, but I guess this past Sunday I found out about a school friend that passed away that was my age and after that my mood kind of went down I’m not sure if that’s what happened but that’s the only thing I can figure that happened so I haven’t been on my new schedule of high and getting things done since then. I’m not sure how to really describe it other than to say that I have had no motivation this week at all and it kind of worries me because I was doing so good and now all the sudden I’m not and I’m not sure what to do about it. Today I have felt kind of headachy and I just don’t feel good and I snapped at somebody for no reason and I’ve gotten basically nothing done. I’m not sure how to get myself back to how I was last week but I will call my therapist tomorrow and see if I can figure out what I need to do right now I’m gonna go take some medicine and go to sleep I think even though I’ve slept half the day it feels like good night everybody.</p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-11862549231229655882021-04-20T20:27:00.003-04:002021-04-20T20:27:56.702-04:002020 Goals vs. How I didSo I came across some goals that I wrote down at the beginning of 2020 and here is how I did:<div><br /></div><div>1. More time with God. - Rocking this one I think. I have definitely brought my perspective back to being more about Him and what He is about. I still have a long way to go but directionally getting there.</div><div>2. Jamie and Robin settled medically. - Well while we are still working on this one, I am definitely a lot closer to being in a better place. I was able to advocate for myself and was switched from a bad medication to a better one and have seen tremendous results for the better. Jamie is seeing help with therapy that is helping and medication is getting under control. She will always struggle but we are moving forward and that is what counts.</div><div>3. Have a family vacation. - Didn't happen due to COVID-19 but we were pretty much quarantined together so does that count?!</div><div>4. Plan an awesome anniversary trip. - I planned an awesome weekend but it got cancelled due to COVID so we went to Steve and Frankie's for a few days of quiet. It was still a good time.</div><div>5. Have a girls weekend with mom and Julie. - This was done at mom's house playing cards and spending time together. </div><div>After this I had eight financial goals. Of those eight, none of those were complete but hey there is always something to be working towards and learning from. </div><div><br /></div><div>So far for 2021 things are going somewhat different than I ever imagined. I am not working. I am not in pain. Our whole family is living together in one house and we all have our own space. Lee and I have found ourselves "grown up" and it seems weird. We will have been married 30 years in June and this is the first time in those 30 years that we have made "adult" purchases such as: chest freezer, lawn mower, weed eater, yard blower, storage shelves, book shelves, DVD cabinets, record cabinets, washer and dryer, and assorted other items. For the first time in all of that time, I have the gumption and feel good enough to want to clean and organize. I feel like I am becoming more in sync with what God wants from me. I am not fully there but I feel His presence more closely than ever before. There are minor squabbles in the house but there is love and support here. We feel supported by our church family and we feel relevant and needed. God has us in His hands. I am loving 2021 regardless of what comes. God will take the negative and use it for His glory. Jump back Satan...Jesus is Alive and coming for you!!!!!</div><div><br /></div><div>Peace and Love,</div><div>Robin</div>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-50697570174107480942021-04-01T17:08:00.001-04:002021-04-01T17:08:29.294-04:00My New Life<p style="text-align: left;">So I feel like I have begun a new life of sorts. Some may know and some may not, but I have been on a medical roller coaster for a long time now but for the sake of time I will keep it short with the past few years. I had seizures in 2018 and everything changed. My world was rocked and I lost my independence, my depression spiraled, my body pain increased, migraines progressed, and I struggled to keep up mentally. In that same year, my dad had a stroke and died and I had a full hysterectomy. WOW what a year. I had a wonderful support system but I didn't know how to ask for help or what to even ask for. My co-workers were extremely helpful in assisting me with navigating work and just listening. There were a couple of church friends who prayed for me diligently but most didn't fully know what was going on or the extent of the hardship my family was facing at the time. Our extended family was too far away to do anything but still talked to us as often as they could and prayed as they could and were able. I was given a medication for my seizures and never asked questions about what it was or if it had any serious side effects. The thing is, when you have so many other things going on in your life, you don't stop to consider the small things and what they are contributing to your self and the whole picture. Fast forward to my life now back in NC. I am seeing a new neurologist and through in October 2020, I began taking a different approach to life and actually taking care of ME. It is hard at first because I am used to caring for others first because that is how I am gifted by God and what I have a love for. It's not that I don't love myself, but I believe we are to love others first. I started eating differently and devoting my time differently. Then I had a sort of "revelation" of sorts. I talked to my sister (who is a nurse) and we were talking about how I should not be in so much pain since I was on this new program. She started asking me questions about sleep life and daily life. Then questions came about medications and we started researching side effects of the medications I was on and there it was in black and white: Common side effects of said medication are - dizziness, moodiness, irritable, drowsiness, aggressiveness, loss of appetite, confusion, tiredness, weakness; You should not take it if you have mental illness, depression, or other mood problems. </p><p style="text-align: left;">Ok so this was a wake up call for me and I wish I had looked at this sooner because the past few years wouldn't have been so bleak and unproductive. After my seizures, I remember being so tired that I had to take mini naps at work because I couldn't make it through the day. I couldn't do housework; I could barely do anything. I constantly had migraines. I have a history of depression and have been on medication for it. All of the side effects describe what I have been experiencing and have all been discussed with my previous neurologist and nothing was ever changed. Now I am not going to rant over fault of doctor or drug company. I only mention it to say that it is very important for you to advocate for yourself and if you can't, then have someone who can advocate for you. I was not in a position that I could advocate for myself and I suffer memory loss so I often have to have someone else advocate for me. Thankfully, my sister and my new doctor were able to help me recognize what was going on and fix the problem. I have been off the other drug since Sunday of this week and there has been a remarkable change. My tiredness is gone, I have more energy than before. My sleep is getting better. I am making sound choices and hyper-organizing my house (side-note-I have NEVER done this before). Much love to my supporters, family, and friends. Much love to my new doctor. Do the right thing - Take care of yourself. </p><p style="text-align: left;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love,</span><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span><br /></span></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-38779340224161481142021-03-26T20:40:00.002-04:002021-03-26T20:40:48.382-04:00Nothing Much to Say<p style="text-align: left;">Nothing much to say today. I have gotten much accomplished today in the way of organization of my home but still have much more to do. I am too tired to get anymore done today so I am going to bed earlier than my normal. Seized the day and looking forward to tomorrow!</p><p style="text-align: left;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love,</span><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span><br /></span></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-52295298436428338862021-03-25T22:01:00.003-04:002021-03-25T22:05:46.422-04:00Thought of the Day<p style="text-align: left;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6Ol5XZ8TqOfwr8DDrhsMstlJXECaNS4fQQRNR2vIj_-q8CqLzyJxgd3f0A58QmWXS2iL9vhS3W6Wgxndc0oSCabf2gszYTRLutqfCjCOoK-wXNcPsWdumkWk_hMYfY1AuMCEO1K1m14E/s2048/20210325_214134.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6Ol5XZ8TqOfwr8DDrhsMstlJXECaNS4fQQRNR2vIj_-q8CqLzyJxgd3f0A58QmWXS2iL9vhS3W6Wgxndc0oSCabf2gszYTRLutqfCjCOoK-wXNcPsWdumkWk_hMYfY1AuMCEO1K1m14E/s320/20210325_214134.jpg" /></a></div><br />Okay so today I was productive and was able to make some purchases that will enable me to be a success at home. I was also able to reflect upon past and present mistakes that I have made and still think about making and it reminded me of several thoughts and moments so I thought I would take a minute to post it here. As children, we make mistakes and are chided and disciplined so that we learn from them so that we hopefully do not repeat those mistakes. It may take several times and some of us really never get it but we still are disciplined for it in some way or another. As adults, it is the same thing; whether it is knowing right from wrong or eating one piece of candy or the whole bag (you know who you are) we suffer consequences for those actions. In my health journey, it has been much the same way. One mistake after another hasn't always taught me to do the right thing and the consequences have been severe but that does not mean that it cannot be turned around even at this point in my life. Every moment of life is worth living; even in our deepest despair. Let me say that again. Even in our deepest regret and despair, our lives are worth living and living well. There are people that care about us even when we don't believe it. We are not beyond hope. Even Paul cried out to God to help him in his unbelief. Great leaders get to be great leaders by going through trials and you are no different. You just have to believe in your own story. If you need help telling yours, let me know and I will be glad to pray with you to help you find it or just talk to you about smaller goals in your life. You have struggles and I have struggles...we can struggle together and succeed together!<p></p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love,</span><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span><br /></span></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-71736773639393661022021-03-24T21:10:00.002-04:002021-03-24T21:10:36.733-04:00Short and Sweet<p style="text-align: left;">Well today I did a lot of walking and then Bible study so now I am worn out. This will be a turn in early day. See y'all tomorrow!</p><p style="text-align: left;"> Love,</p><p style="text-align: left;"> Robin</p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-35276956397552677002021-03-23T20:41:00.000-04:002021-03-23T20:41:52.736-04:00Shining Star<p style="text-align: left;">Okay so today was a little different. I pretty much stayed in my pajamas most of the day, however I still worked on my list. I began my day with a mild stretching workout and it made me feel really good. I continued down my list and then got tired so I took a nap while listening to calming music. I must point out that this was just a nap and not a keep lying in the bed and feeling sorry for myself kind of thing. I have been known to do that and I am making an honest effort not to do that and pushing myself to do more than I am capable of or that I think I am capable of at the moment. I got up and took a refreshing shower while listening to 70's dance music (YES it was rocking!). There were many greats and many I wanted to reference for today but I ended on one of my favorites that keep on motivating me from childhood until now. Earth, Wind, and Fire - "Shining Star"</p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;">"<span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">You're a shining star </span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"><span> </span>No matter who you are</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"> Shining bright to see</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"> What you could truly be"</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"> <span style="background-color: white; color: #70757a; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px;">Source: </span><a data-ved="2ahUKEwjY45P71cfvAhUvx1kKHeFpDWUQ5s4FMAN6BAgHEAY" href="https://www.musixmatch.com/" ping="/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.musixmatch.com/&ved=2ahUKEwjY45P71cfvAhUvx1kKHeFpDWUQ5s4FMAN6BAgHEAY" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.1); background-color: white; color: #70757a; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; outline: 0px;">Musixmatch</a></p><p style="text-align: left;">We all have different gifts. We all have different dreams. We all look different. None of us are ugly. God did not make us that way so stop comparing yourself. I will never try to sell you on what I am doing but I will tell you what my experiences are so you can succeed based on what your needs are. If you need someone to talk to let me know. If you want advice, well I'll give the best I can with what I have been given. </p><p style="text-align: left;">The rest of my day? I put on my makeup and went shopping. I did not buy anything but I did go outside of my comfort zone and go out in public so my daughter could go look around. As far as my list, I got over half-way done but hey if you dream big you are bound to get something done. </p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love,</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span> </p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-64395201709577694852021-03-22T14:46:00.000-04:002021-03-22T14:46:13.895-04:00This is How We Overcome<p style="text-align: left;">We are overcoming today. So this is a little weird and I don't know if everyone is like this but I wake up really early and think I can conquer this day and have all this energy and then an hour later, I am over it already. Are you like that? I know that part of it has to do with my medical issues and the depression so I am doing my best to overcome. My husband told me to get right back out of bed so I did and put on makeup and had my son drive me to town to get me a coffee. So now I am trying and determined to tackle some housework. I am really good at making lists and then the lists get overlooked and thrown out. I made a list and gave myself permission to have a couple of days to get it done and I am comfortable and have a plan set out before me. I am working for the Lord who gives me strength. My song for today is Hillsong's "This is How We Overcome":</p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><div class="TzHB6b cLjAic LMRCfc" data-hveid="CBgQAA" data-ved="2ahUKEwiXqJWJx8TvAhU5MlkFHRYgA7MQy9oBKAB6BAgYEAA" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; margin: 0px 0px 40px;"><div class="sATSHe"><div class="O6ALOd"><div class="LuVEUc B03h3d P6OZi V14nKc ptcLIOszQJu__wholepage-card wp-ms" data-hveid="CBgQAQ"><div class="UDZeY OTFaAf" style="font-size: 14px;"><div class="wDYxhc NFQFxe" data-attrid="kc:/music/recording_cluster:lyrics" data-md="113" lang="en-US" style="clear: none;"><div class="wGduib" data-hveid="CAcQAA" data-ved="2ahUKEwiXqJWJx8TvAhU5MlkFHRYgA7MQsEwwA3oECAcQAA"><g-expandable-container data-slct="mnr-c" jsaction="C7xow:Z6bwpe;xpd_c:fW2qAb;xpd_e:AvkpRc;xNpQtd:Nh5q2c;U6VCqe:GsRPff;Ep2Mgc:AgioGc;xpd_t:yELBLe;BDs6B:fW2qAb;ep03Ne:AvkpRc;gvA4Rc:yELBLe" jscontroller="UxJOle" jsshadow="" style="display: block;"><div jsname="gI9xcc" jsslot="1"><div class="Oh5wg HudAHb" style="line-height: 20px; margin: 0px;"><div class="PZPZlf" data-lyricid="Musixmatch39188279"><g-expandable-content aria-hidden="false" data-eb="1" data-mt="0" jsaction=";rcuQ6b:npT2md" jscontroller="wrFDyc" jsname="Vinbg" jsshadow="" style="display: block; transition: none 0s ease 0s;"><span jsslot=""><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Your light broke through my night</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Restored exceeding joy</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Your grace fell like the rain</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">And made this desert live</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my mourning into dancing</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my sorrow into joy</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Your hand lifted me up</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I stand on higher ground</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Your praise rose in my heart</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">And made this valley sing</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my mourning into dancing</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my sorrow into joy</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my mourning into dancing</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You have turned my sorrow into joy</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 0px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">This is how we overcome</span><br /><span style="color: #70757a; font-size: 12px;">Source: </span><a data-ved="2ahUKEwiXqJWJx8TvAhU5MlkFHRYgA7MQ5s4FMAN6BAgHEAY" href="https://www.musixmatch.com/" ping="/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.musixmatch.com/&ved=2ahUKEwiXqJWJx8TvAhU5MlkFHRYgA7MQ5s4FMAN6BAgHEAY" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.1); color: #70757a; font-size: 12px; outline: 0px;">Musixmatch</a></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 0px;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 0px;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love,</span><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc" jsname="U8S5sf" style="margin-bottom: 0px;"><span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span><br /></span></div></span></g-expandable-content></div></div></div></g-expandable-container></div></div></div></div></div></div></div>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-83273526314569571462021-03-21T22:30:00.000-04:002021-03-21T22:30:14.840-04:00A Little Late Is Better Than Never<p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Okay so I know it is a little late in the day to be posting but I have been really busy today and the computer has been occupied so I have been biding my time and awaiting the perfect moment to write but nonetheless I am here. Today has been a pretty awesome day. Let me start by saying that I have been on this amazing program called Optavia since October and it has made a big change in the way I feel, plus I have lost 42 pounds. I will be taking a break from it until I am restocked which will take about a week but I feel pretty good about that victory and I will post my sassy pants photo that I took in church this morning at the end of this post when I am done. I actually was able to cross my legs and that is no small thing. So I left early to go get breakfast for everyone else in the house and found a gospel channel and this song came on the radio that I had not heard before and the lyrics just spoke to me because I know them to be true and it made my heart sing. The song is by Tauren Wells and the lyrics are here:</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></p><div class="bbVIQb" jsname="Vinbg" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Isn't it funny how out of nowhere</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Life can bright us all to the pause?</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But it's so comforting to know</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">That God's loves seeks out the defenseless</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">And covers us all in the trenches</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">I was in certain danger</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Caught in the crossfire of hope and regret</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Thought I could be my own savior</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But I'm sinking, sinking fast</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">'Cause it's too much to handle</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Alone in the battle</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I'm desperate for You, Lord</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Heart under fire, facing defeat</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">So close to surrender, to my enemies</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But love came from heaven, to fight for me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless, You climb in the trenches</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">The trenches with me</span></div><div class="ujudUb" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Faithful from the beginning</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You felt my pain, You have been where I've been</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">I hear You say, "It is finished"</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">It is written we win in the end</span></div></div><div class="bbVIQb" jsname="WbKHeb" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"><div class="ujudUb u7wWjf" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Heart under fire, facing defeat</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">So close to surrender, to my enemies</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But love came from heaven, to fight for me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless, You climb in the trenches</span></div><div class="ujudUb xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">The King of all glory, made Himself low</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">To be my defender, wherever I go</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">My shield and my refuge, protector and friend</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You're always here, You're always here</span></div><div class="ujudUb xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Heart's under fire, I'm facing defeat</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">So close to surrender, to my enemies</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But love came from heaven, You came and You rescued me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless, You climb in the trenches</span></div><div class="ujudUb xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless (come on)</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When nothing else could help</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When we had no more answers</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Yes Sir, it was Your love that we started to attribute to us</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">Yea, You healed, You lifted us!</span></div><div class="ujudUb xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 12px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">Heart's under fire (hallelujah), I'm facing defeat (yes God)</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">So close to surrender, to my enemies</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">But love came from heaven, to fight for me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless, You climb in the trenches</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">When I am defenseless, You climb in the trenches</span></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge">The trenches with me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You're here with me</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You won't leave me alone</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">You climb in the trenches</span><br /><span jsname="YS01Ge">With me</span></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span jsname="YS01Ge"><span style="color: #70757a; font-size: 12px;">Source: </span><a data-ved="2ahUKEwiriuKN7MLvAhU8ElkFHVUXDwEQ5s4FKAAwAXoECAUQAQ" href="https://www.musixmatch.com/" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.1); color: #70757a; font-size: 12px;">Musixmatch</a></span></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;">I love these lyrics! Okay then off we went to church and it was a good day followed by a nap and meetings and more church. I am making a choice to believe that no matter how far down in depression and pain I get, I will rise because God is in the trenches with me and is lifting me so I can rise to His occasion for His purpose. Here is my fancy pants picture! </div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Love, </span><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> </span><span> Robin</span><br /></span></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div><div class="ujudUb WRZytc xpdxpnd" data-mh="-1" jsname="U8S5sf" style="line-height: 1.58; margin-bottom: 0px; max-height: none; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease 0s;"><br /></div></div><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: medium;"> </span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk9-SX5QbgocU9MB9-IIoGv_PQRB-64NoUSXMN0SmhcJq4eTG97gj0KiHAoendPS0O5NtbvY_V82kEdxBCrRzp98tZFjuLyEk6dm7YoZ2t_G3Yoa6mVyPtasOS4vEL8aBTtettkyzzw1g/s2048/20210321_100400_HDR.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk9-SX5QbgocU9MB9-IIoGv_PQRB-64NoUSXMN0SmhcJq4eTG97gj0KiHAoendPS0O5NtbvY_V82kEdxBCrRzp98tZFjuLyEk6dm7YoZ2t_G3Yoa6mVyPtasOS4vEL8aBTtettkyzzw1g/s320/20210321_100400_HDR.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span><p></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-5953022218928211052021-03-20T08:56:00.005-04:002021-03-20T08:59:08.922-04:00<p style="height: 0px;">Well here I go again on my own. Going down the only road I've ever...wait a minute, I am not amidst Sammy Hagar this moment nor am I alone; but I am again posting so here I go again. So I got up out of bed this morning and put on full make up and clothes and curled my hair (btw...not worth the effort, but hey I tried something new that I used to like to do). I walked my dog and listened to music loud fully intending on walking outside very loudly to get some exercise in only to find that it was WAY to cold to stay out there for too long so I am back to writing. Baby steps. So I guess my one thing I am working towards this week on my list is doing my hair and makeup and dressing up to make myself feel better. I will let you know in a week if it made a difference. So far, I feel more motivated to action but not sure if I want to wake everyone up at the moment so I am weighing my options. Okay so I am going to tackle the positive affirmations from Pinterest. Let us see what I can find today. So the first thing I found when I typed Positive Affirmation Quotes for Women led me to rebekah-joan.com. Here is what she has to say: </p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"> </p><p style="height: 0px;"> </p><p style="height: 0px;"> </p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>I am worthy of love</li><li>I deeply and completely accept myself</li><li>I have everything I need to succeed in life</li><li>I am calm and at peace</li><li>I am thankful for everything I have</li><li>My life is full of abundance and happiness</li><li>My past experience does not define me</li><li>I'm proud of myself for all of my big and little victories</li><li>What is for me will not pass over me</li><li>I am confident in my abilities to make the right decisions</li><li>I don't let others' thoughts or judgments affect me</li><li>I accept myself exactly as I am</li><li>My life is bursting with love, happiness, and prosperity</li><li>I find joy in the little things everywhere</li><li>My own self care is a priority for me</li></ul>Other sayings I found helpful:<p style="height: 0px;">-"My ability to conquer my challenges is limitless; my potential to succeed is infinite."</p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;">-"I am conquering my illness; I am defeating it steadily each day."</p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;">-"My life is great. I am great. Everything is happening for me. All of the things that I am currently experiencing are only taking me to the next level of my life. I am growing. I am getting better. I choose to believe in sudden miracles and unexpected blessings."</p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;">I hope today brings you joy. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Love, Robin</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj110DivoromeQjVNpxgr0sDzDNXAvlTvUoQDfeapNz11OLdHqOg537OZoPjZ_FA0YGSMYFRg63Kra-HBjJZORC_l_XQHtlL6zPyf9grQBVBEJLWNyeh7LaffL-bJgw0gxWqqgMDwwIBYg/s1934/20210320_085152.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1934" data-original-width="1196" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj110DivoromeQjVNpxgr0sDzDNXAvlTvUoQDfeapNz11OLdHqOg537OZoPjZ_FA0YGSMYFRg63Kra-HBjJZORC_l_XQHtlL6zPyf9grQBVBEJLWNyeh7LaffL-bJgw0gxWqqgMDwwIBYg/s320/20210320_085152.jpg" /></a></div><br /><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="height: 0px;"><br /></p>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-61931184152665116362021-03-19T19:36:00.000-04:002021-03-19T19:36:01.799-04:00<span style="font-family: georgia; font-size: medium;">I am not very good at blogging obviously. I try something new and then within a few weeks I put it down again only to leave it there for a few years until I think about it again. This time I am writing again because I have a lot to unload and my therapist thinks it may be a good idea to put my ideas down no matter how deep or shallow or simple they are. So here I am. I suppose I survived 202o by the skin of my ever breaking teeth. (no that is not a colloquialism for something else-my teeth are actually breaking) I wish I could say that things are quite alright with me but then I would be lying and I am not like that. I like to be transparent or so I like to say but then I am not totally open with everyone about where I am in the moment. So let me start with today and begin with that. I finally spoke to my therapist today and she recommended that I start doing things for myself like carving things out for myself since I am overwhelmed by everything. This is my effort. Most days I lay in bed depressed and in pain not able to move past myself. I have this belief that God is holding me because I can't hold myself up at the moment. I pray that this is true and believe it to be true because his word says it is. My heart breaks every day and if I was honest with anyone other than my wonderful husband, I would probably be sitting in a mental institution right now. I do have a support system; it is just hard for me to let them in most of the time. Okay so for my assignment suggestions were: </span><div><p class="MsoNormal"></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Increase cognitive behavioral skills</li><li>Look for positive affirmations or ideas on Pinterest </li><li>Look for Self help books</li><li>Make things or do puzzles</li><li>Dance or play board games with family</li><li>Distract self by positive interventions</li><li>Writing or drawing</li><li>Reprogram and be kind to yourself</li><li>Come up with a mantra to a happier self</li><li>Do your hair or makeup or dress up to feel good</li><li>Do your nails</li><li>Make a list of things to self soothe</li><li>Go to the dollar tree or thrift stores</li><li>Book reading or walking</li><li>Make a list of what you used to like to do and start doing
them</li><li>Make time for yourself daily</li><li>Make “I AM … note cards”</li></ul><span style="font-family: georgia; font-size: medium;">So I started today by taking a 30 minute hot shower, shaving my legs, washing my face, listening to funky dance music, took time to put on make up and painted my finger and toe nails and I am not going anywhere. My hope is that I can write a little something every day to work myself up to real writing. Stay tuned...</span><p></p>
<span style="font-family: georgia; font-size: medium;"></span></div>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-12352594654688855492018-06-29T08:41:00.002-04:002018-06-29T09:11:40.803-04:00Happy Anniversary <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk-H8qVFyt-cGZe1p2SozSHPY6izqV7BZvOHSqVCAb6t94RDUbxD_JLWbhC7jBuncNi_poObk4GgwIazWWEuDipR-pFyoj73IQ_FmKs8cC_8GVX9NEALX33KBaHtd7xCX6MdwnVsghGKs/s1600/Cake+Face.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="700" data-original-width="597" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk-H8qVFyt-cGZe1p2SozSHPY6izqV7BZvOHSqVCAb6t94RDUbxD_JLWbhC7jBuncNi_poObk4GgwIazWWEuDipR-pFyoj73IQ_FmKs8cC_8GVX9NEALX33KBaHtd7xCX6MdwnVsghGKs/s320/Cake+Face.bmp" width="272" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Happy Anniversary!</td></tr>
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I have not posted in my blog in almost a year. Maybe I will try it again. I want to wish my husband Lee a Happy Anniversary. 27 years ago, I married my best friend. We are closer now than ever. We have 3 beautiful children, a very special daughter in law, a sweet grandson, two cats, and an adorable dog. I remember that day well. Early that morning, I remember two of my bridesmaid-friends bringing me bags of one of everything from Hardee's menu for breakfast. Then we went to the apartment pool and jumped in with all our clothes on. That day, many people participated and donated food and time to help us with our ceremony. Songs were sung, vows were cited, and I was very fortunate to have my dad be able to walk me down the aisle. All of our friends were there and it was a special day. That night, we drove to Dillon, SC for our first night and then the next day we drove back home to be at his cousin's wedding. After that we stayed at Kings Dominion for several days and then came back home. All this time, we have been committed to one another never looking elsewhere for comfort. We are closer now than ever before and I can honestly say that he is still my best friend. Thanks to all our friends and family who have always been there and supported us. We love you all. </div>
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Special shout out to: </div>
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Scott and Sherry Hunt</div>
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Jamie Parker</div>
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Chelley Purut</div>
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Julie Vick Carter</div>
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Keith and Wendy Stokes</div>
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Beth Ann Sarpong</div>
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Julie Pledger Carter</div>
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Cheryl Hagan</div>
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Rose Hill</div>
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Ann Groves</div>
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Steve Modlin</div>
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Ken Pledger</div>
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Stacy Modlin</div>
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Aaron Olvey</div>
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Richie Davis</div>
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Tammy and Donna</div>
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David Sloop</div>
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All of our families/cousins/aunts/uncles/grandparents/friends</div>
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All of the ladies/musicians from Parkwood Baptist Church</div>
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Mark Pridgen</div>
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Steve Kirkland</div>
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Marlene Jones</div>
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And most importantly Bruce and Carroll Stewart (RIP Tara)</div>
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* There is no way I can remember everyone so if I left someone out, I sincerely apologize. </div>
TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-2379533242110334602017-07-22T10:55:00.001-04:002017-07-22T10:55:06.471-04:00A New LifeWell, I guess it is past time for an update. These past few months have been full of depression and uncertainty. To feel like your life has been ripped open and fallen apart cannot begin to describe what I was feeling. Today I am amazed at the turn of events and am completely humbled at the sight of my God. He never left me, no matter how alone I felt. I would like to thank all the people who prayed for me during this time and for those who let me know that they were there for me and had my back through it all. I am pleased to say that it is behind me and I can move forward. Through it all, I put back on some weight that I had lost and had major migraines and stress. Now I can say that I can turn it around and move forward. I was able to get back to work this week. Hallelujah! It was great to see my co-workers again and to finally feel that I could make a difference again. I love my job and I know that is rare. Not many people can say that. I love my co-workers and I love the families that I come into contact with. I consider myself blessed beyond measure and keep asking if this is real. <div>
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Family updates:</div>
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Lee took a part-time job at Wal-Mart as a door greeter and he likes it because he gets to talk to people. Our congregation is still behind us and we are looking for opportunities to grow our youth program constantly.</div>
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I told you about myself. I am finally back to work and back on my weight loss program in the coming weeks. </div>
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Geoffry got a call back for a job at Wal-Mart this past week. Not sure when he will start but he also got a letter for a civil service job so his outlook is much better.</div>
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Becca is staying at home with our adorable grandson Marcus. She has been a big help to me.</div>
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Chris took a fall at camp so his ankle has been recovering. He is no longer in Boy Scouts.</div>
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Jamie is doing okay. She has an upcoming appointment with a dermatologist on Monday so pray that they can do something about her skin.</div>
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Still have our handsome dog Kobi and three cats (one is an outside cat).</div>
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Pray for me and tell me how I can pray for you. Love you all, but most importantly love my God who will always be for me.<br /><br />
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TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-20240269536291319022017-05-17T10:13:00.001-04:002017-05-17T10:14:13.752-04:00Negative is the new normalSo I wish I could say that things were much better, but I really can't. I thank God for my family and the <i>few </i>friends that I have. I am having a really hard time not feeling defeated at the moment. Sometimes people say it is good to make a list of pros and cons. I will try.<br />
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<u>Pros</u></div>
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I still have...</div>
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<li>God</li>
<li>Lee</li>
<li>Chris</li>
<li>Jamie</li>
<li>Geoffry</li>
<li>Becca</li>
<li>Marcus</li>
<li>Kobi</li>
<li>my life</li>
<li>family</li>
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<u>Cons</u></div>
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<li>Still have no clue what is going on health-wise with myself. I am struggling with depression and weight challenges every day. I have been sick the past two weeks and have started having episodes, one of which caused me to black out and hit my head yet doctors say everything is perfectly normal. If that is normal, I don't want it.</li>
<li>Have no idea what is going to happen with our family with my legal situation. Because of this, I am unable to work, so unable to provide for our family. God gives and God takes away. I will continue in poverty and be joyful about it. </li>
<li>Have no idea why people in churches refuse to move forward. It is almost like they want to die and guess what? They will. They are hanging themselves and refuse to take responsibility for it. The bad thing about it is that there are <u><b>WILLING</b></u> people in congregations trying to step up and do what is necessary but unfortunately their voices are smothered out by the few who want to stay in the dark with their traditions. Don't get me wrong, I am all about tradition because I think it is important but when it causes the church to die and for the word of Christ to not be heard then what good are we doing? I am tired of trying and getting nowhere. I am done. Someone else can pick up what I do. I will no longer be on any "lists" of things to do. My voice will no longer be heard in matters or in song. I will search for other opportunities to share Christ and connect with others.</li>
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I wish I had something positive to say, but unfortunately I don't and sometimes it just is that way and there is nothing anyone can say or do to make a difference.</div>
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TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-74978734225044863812017-02-13T13:07:00.002-05:002017-02-13T13:07:42.898-05:00Getting a RestartOkay. Ready. Set. Restart.<br />
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I have been majorly slack in many areas in my life. <br />
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Spiritual<br />
Mental<br />
Physical<br />
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<strong>Spiritually</strong> speaking, I have not been diligent in my walk with God. I talk to Him, but I don't take it the many other steps that I need to take to be truly close to Him. I was very moved and convicted hearing my husband preach yesterday. He has been talking about the ACTS method of prayer. <br />
A - Adoration<br />
C - Confession<br />
T - Thanksgiving<br />
S - Supplication<br />
I was particularly moved by what he said about how we are "too busy" to get to God or to our families for that matter. He used an example of how he may sit down first thing in the morning with good intentions of having a daily devotional time with God, but looking at one email or taking the dog for a walk or helping others get ready in the mornings or checking one status on Facebook can distract us from our true purpose. Those things are not bad in and of themselves, but if we are trying to set aside time for God, why don't we fully commit? Thanks Lee. I am restarting my walk with God with fresh eyes. Day One of my recommitment to God. <br />
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<strong>Mentally </strong>speaking, I have not been faithful to myself. I get overloaded with everything going on that I have not mentally taken care of myself, therefore I am over-stressing and making myself inaccessible to my family. I often feel alone and isolated because I don't have anyone I trust to take everything (God and my husband is the two exceptions). I do have one special lady who is available for me to talk to, but I haven't been able to make "close" friends anywhere I have been. I have a handful of friends with whom I would consider lifetime friends, but they are not in close proximity to me and it is not always easy in ministry to find trust in people. Don't get me wrong, I love my church family. They take care of my family and they love us unconditionally, but it is different than having a close friend to confide in and have fun with. Day One of my recommitment to self.<br />
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<strong>Physically</strong> speaking, I have completely forsaken my body and the hard work I put in all those months ago. I lost 160 pounds, felt great, and finally felt comfortable with my body (excess skin aside). I still felt like I could lose another 25-30 pounds, but now I have gone in the opposite direction. I am 30 pounds heavier instead and I can tell a difference. I am not unhappy, but I know better and I know what I have to do to get back in my "healthy mindset." Stress and circumstances have sent me spiraling into the unhealthy void. Well, no more! Several weeks ago, I started a free fit club at our church, in the hopes to have others to be accountable to. So far, there is four of us that meet every Saturday morning to "walk" inside the sanctuary. As of today, I WILL take back charge of what I put in my mouth and stop mindlessly eating. I will remind myself daily that today's choices equals next month's body. What can I do to move more, eat less, and feel better each day? It is up to me. Day One of my recommitment to my body.<br />
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Family Update:<br />
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Lee and I are still going strong and will celebrate 26 years of marriage this June.<br />
Chris is quickly reaching his dad's height and is becoming a responsible young man.<br />
Jamie still struggles with health issues, but is turning into a beautiful young lady.<br />
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Geoffry, Becca, and Marcus have moved back in with us and Geoffry's new job is going really well. Thanks to all who have prayed for them and their journey. We are beyond excited that we are getting to see more of Marcus. <br />
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Pet Status:<br />
Kobi - Still our biggest baby (Thinks he is still a puppy)<br />
Penny - Has become more sociable since we added another cat.<br />
Katniss - Our first new addition. She is loud and gives Penny something to do and Kobi something to bark at.<br />
Finally, Midnight - Our newest addition and our basement cat. He was neighbor's cat and was unable to make the journey with their move so he moved into our basement this winter. TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-85899568493970105202016-06-23T08:49:00.002-04:002016-06-23T09:03:08.738-04:00Vacation is Coming<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;">One more work day left until vacation starts. I have enjoyed my precious alone time with my husband of 25 years (next week), but I am missing my children. I can't wait to see them and to visit family and friends over the next week. We will hopefully be in NC sometime tomorrow evening and will be there for a whole week. I am excited, not for the driving part but for the fellowship of family and friends that I have not seen in quite some time. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;">Work update: I started a new position last week, however I will not be able to fully get into the role until later in July due to vacation and having to cover phones when I get back. I am looking forward to new responsibilities. Right now, I pretty much have nothing to do until that happens. Oh well, I will be so thankful that I have a job and anticipate the coming work that will greet me upon my return from vacation.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;">Family update: Lee and I will celebrate 25 years of being married next week while on vacation. I love this man so much. He is my best friend and who God created for me. Geoffry finally has his car and he and his wife Becca are trying to look at future options for their own place very soon. Their son, my grandson Marcus is a joy and I am very much looking forward to holding him when I get to NC. Christopher has been at camp all this week and is still involved with Boy Scouts, has passed his grade, and as of the end of school has a girlfriend. Jamie has been enjoying the summer in NC for the last several weeks. Like I said, I can't wait to see my children. I have missed their presence. Kobi and Penny are still good. They will most likely not be speaking to us when we get back for leaving them for so long. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;">Weight update: Nothing much to update. I have stayed steady at 170. I would like to go further, but that would require further surgery to remove excess skin. I'm not sure I can afford it so I will be elated with my progress. I am comfortable with myself as I am. I have lost a solid 160 pounds since December of 2013. I have more to work on, but don't we all? When I get back from vacation, I will again re-start my healthy options and routines. It is all about re-starting every day and allowing yourself something small. I say small because a treat every day is not optimal for healthy living, but maybe one per week or per month would be better. I would like to have an exercise routine that works for me and my schedule. One that does not require thinking too much or planning in advance-just doing. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;">I will leave you today with a quote I put in a previous blog several years ago. I am going to post this in my cubicle at work and then at home as well so I can remind myself every day that God is my #1 and I need to make it so in my life.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;"><em style="font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px;"></em></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;"><em style="font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px;"></em></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444; font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; line-height: 17px;"><em style="font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px;">“If I could give everyone only one piece of advice it would be the following, ‘Greet each day by sliding out of bed and hitting your knees. Tell God how much you love Him and thank Him for everything you can think of. Then give Him your day, energy, passion, desire, and needs. Talk to Him throughout your day. Turn off the radio while you drive and picture Him sitting beside you. Tell Him what is on your mind and ask Him advice. Then wait for the answer. He is faithful to always respond...we often simply assume He will not. Finally, treat each day with the desire to make your Heavenly Father smile. I like to close my eyes and picture my actions bringing a smile to His face.’” Dr. Jill Jones, DOD- 08/08/2010. RIP to you and your son.</em></span> TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-31937527779944853362016-06-14T11:01:00.000-04:002016-06-14T11:01:22.459-04:00How To Weep In Public: A Review<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"></span><br />
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<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"><span style="color: #303030; font-family: "bookman old style" , serif; font-size: small; line-height: 24px;">I want to begin by saying that I am a reviewing an advance copy that was provided by the publisher free of charge for the purpose of review. I received it through the Blogging For Books <a href="http://www.bloggingforbooks.com/">website</a>. You can purchase the book <a href="https://www.amazon.com/How-Weep-Public-Offerings-Depression/dp/0804139709/188-7060437-0640428?ie=UTF8&*Version*=1&*entries*=0">HERE</a> . </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"> <em>This book is supposed to be a satire about how to experience depression in a fulfilling way. I found the book to be somewhat funny, however it seems to be more of an excuse for the author to speak opinions in vulgar ways with no purpose. Each chapter says basically the same thing over and over again. I found it hard to make it through each one. There are some practical suggestions regarding navigating through relationships while in depression mode. </em></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.jokesnovak.com/">http://www.jokesnovak.com/</a>TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-53436095444421848042016-06-07T11:00:00.000-04:002016-06-07T11:58:37.033-04:00Still on Cloud NineWhat a weekend! What a weekend! Let me say it again...What a weekend!!! I was finally able to get my hair cut and colored on Saturday and it feels great! Plus, I have the best family in the whole world. God blessed me so much through them this past weekend. First, Geoffry came up to PA to pick up his car. He brought with him Lee's dad Steve and step mom Frankie, his wife Rebecca, and my beautiful grandson Marcus. If my heart wasn't already full enough, within an hour of them arriving on Saturday, I found out what Lee had been secretly plotting for 2 weeks prior - one of my very best friends from high school Chelley showed up with her son Aydin to surprise me. What a shocker! We were able to go out to dinner and ice cream and then I went with her to see her campsite. Sunday they were all at church with us and then followed back to our house for a marvelous BBQ chicken Sunday dinner that we were all able to sit at my kitchen table and enjoy. We played cards and just hung out while some of the family took care of Geoffry's car. Then I was able to enjoy a sweet nap with my daughter and grandson until everyone got back to the house. To top all of this off, yesterday my husband picked me up from work and took me out to a wonderful dinner at a restaurant we have been wanting to try. It was an amazing Italian dinner and my new favorite restaurant. I had a great time hanging out with him and walking around Wal-Mart for a little while. Then when we got home, we watched a movie with our son Chris. What an amazing time of fellowship I have had this weekend. I am so full-hearted and happy. I will miss our daughter Jamie as she is now in NC visiting family until we come down later this month. Wow! I am still kind of without words to express my gratitude for my family and friends. May God truly bless them all. TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-78472067933183881352016-05-25T11:48:00.003-04:002016-05-25T11:48:43.367-04:00A Review of "Together at the Table" by Hillary Manton Lodge<br />
<img alt="Together at the Table" height="324" id="Image3_img" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiMezCiimwERBU3JA0AxEVUag3FbYnSvaFRbT0cMymbrf21wJyRvcEaTFL1wPjJsVrST71ZPsaCxW43iAcgR_ceDogCsMDudDumLJ2HE2xk3U55lYfhjG9q-zchjmn20ZpjjHMA9i-RQGW/s264/Together+at+the+Table+-+blog+sidebar.png" width="216" /><br />
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<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"><span style="color: #303030; font-family: "Bookman Old Style", serif; font-size: small; line-height: 24px; orphans: 1;">I want to begin by saying that I am a reviewing an advance copy that was provided by the publisher free of charge for the purpose of review. I received it through the Blogging For Books <a href="http://www.bloggingforbooks.com/">website</a>. You can purchase the book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Good-Things-Seeing-Through-Favor/dp/1601427743" rel="" target="_self" title="Link: http://www.amazon.com/Good-Things-Seeing-Through-Favor/dp/1601427743"></a><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Together-Table-Novel-Second-Helpings-ebook/dp/B013NI8DUE?ie=UTF8&ref_=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top">HERE</a> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"><span style="color: #303030; font-family: "Bookman Old Style", serif; font-size: small; line-height: 24px; orphans: 1;"></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #555555; font-family: "arial";"><span style="color: #303030; font-family: "Bookman Old Style", serif; font-size: small; line-height: 24px; orphans: 1;"></span><em>I enjoyed this book very much. Ms. Lodge doesn't fail to keep the story interesting in this follow-up in the series. The heroine continues to get to the bottom of understanding her family roots. It is a continued tale of love in hardships and the threat of lost loves during a time of war and secrets due to Jewish heritage. All of the characters were well played and the ending left me wanting more from the story. Hillary Manton Lodge has once again proven herself to be an inspired fiction writer and I look forward to reading more from her.</em> </span><br />
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<a href="http://www.hillarymantonlodge.com/">http://www.hillarymantonlodge.com/</a><br />
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TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-50821593226052363342016-05-13T12:42:00.002-04:002016-05-13T12:42:28.885-04:00Words Unspoken Until NowWell, here is my 18 month weight loss check in results: I am no longer obese. I am not sure if I ever thought I would hear these words or not. My doctors are pleased with my progress and say that I am at a good stage. I am holding between 160 and 170 pounds and have finally made it out of the obese category. That feels good. I finally feel "comfortable" with myself. I know I have further to go to my original goal, but honestly if I don't make it that far, it will be okay because of how far I have come. 160 pounds is a lot to have lost. I am proud of myself. I can be the person I want to be. Thanks to all my supporters (you know who you are). Many friends and relatives have gotten me to this place with much encouragement. Most of all, thanks be to God to whom I owe everything. You make me want to be a better woman.TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-46719713229249197442016-05-03T16:04:00.002-04:002016-05-03T16:52:12.369-04:009 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage - A ReviewThis book should receive 5 stars for couples in new marriages. This reader is 25 years into marriage so there was not a lot of new material. With that being said, there was still a lot of great material to revisit and definitely good material to help newer couples. The suggestions are right on and funny because they are so true. I enjoyed reading this book and would encourage anyone to read it even for entertainment purposes. <br />
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"I received this book from <a href="http://www.bloggingforbooks.org/" target="_blank">Blogging for Books</a> for this review."TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-71107255254612999172016-04-20T14:07:00.000-04:002016-04-20T14:07:07.670-04:00A New Day with HelpI don't normally post so close together, but I felt I needed to say something about today. I have been facing anxiety and depression for a while now. Like yesterday, I won't put it up on Facebook because #1 - I don't want everyone to know my business or rather I don't feel comfortable confessing this to all people and #2 - I don't want pity from people and that is what I will get if I tell this to some people. I feel embarrassed because as a Christian, I don't know how I could possibly be facing something like depression. I know God has me in His hands always so why am I feeling like this? I don't question Him, I question myself. He has brought me through many other "down" situations and I have no reason to doubt He will do it again with me being stronger on the other side. <br />
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Here it is: I feel like crying every single day that I get up. I am experiencing health problems like chest pains and just not feeling good on a day to day basis. In the course of this going on, I have had to think about why it is happening. Am I stressed? Am I anxious over the little things? Yes and ...Yes. When I lost my job (not of my doing) last year, I was devastated. I loved my co-workers and I was in a good place. Maybe I was too comfortable and maybe well I don't know what but I still harbor hurt feelings over the whole thing. It wasn't their fault either so that is not what I am saying. They didn't want it any more than I did. It is just what had to happen (Thanks to our governor not passing the budget for last year). I had to take a part time job at Kmart and while I do or have enjoyed customer service or retail in the past, it is not what I am meant for. I don't think I am "destined" for something greater or that I am better than that, its just that I worked hard to go back to school at a late time in my life and I think my talents can be used elsewhere. My heart is in social work. I have taken civil service tests and God blessed me with a job with the county here. The drawbacks: Pay is over half what I was making before. Better than Kmart - yes. Benefits are great - yes. I feel isolated where I am. It is a truly lonely job. I am used to having constant interaction with people. I don't get it here. Plus, I know language is not a big deal to a lot of people but it bothers me when it is all day every day from almost everyone around me. I can only hope that one day I will finally get a call about the job that I really want and maybe there is a reason God is withholding it from me. Maybe I am not ready. Maybe it isn't what I think it will be. Maybe it will be worse than where I am. <br />
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When will my weight loss be enough? I am staying at the same weight which is good, but I know that I have 20 more pounds of fat to lose and then I want to get rid of extra skin because of what I perceive it to look like. Sometimes I make bad choices. I don't overdo it but I worry that I will pick up old habits.<br />
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I want to be closer to God, but I don't think I make enough of an effort to be where I want to be. When will I allow the Spirit to move in me? When will I see that Jesus covers me? When will I see that God is holding me when I can't stand up?<br />
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I worry about my children for different reasons. I worry that Geoffry and Becca will not find what they are looking for. I worry that they will stay in a state of constant upheaval and will never have a place of their own. I agonize over not being able to see Marcus. I worry about Jamie and how medications over the years is going to affect her in the long run. I worry about how we can get her over this eczema and how God can use it to help others. She is in a constant state of pain and there is nothing I can do for her. I worry about Chris and how he copes with the world. I worry about him passing his grades and being able to go to the college he wants to so he can do what he wants in life. I worry about how he will acclimate to life after being with us or how he will cope with life once he is an adult. I worry that I haven't done enough to be a good role model for them. Some days I come home and I don't feel like doing anything because I am always exhausted.<br />
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I know God called us to be in Pennsylvania and there are many ways we can minister to others here. This has been the best move we have ever made. Sometimes though, I miss my family in North Carolina. I know that God wants me here but my flesh is so weak. <br />
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These are just a few of the things that are going on in my head right now. I was blessed today because Lee prayed for me and made me a worship CD to play today so I would be uplifted. I love this man that God gave to me.<br />
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If you would sometime...Pray for me.TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-36346337731241952792016-04-19T14:17:00.001-04:002016-04-19T14:17:56.232-04:00CrashingI am having a hard time acclimating to my new job. I don't feel like I fit in AT ALL. I wish I could say different and pretend how much I love my job, but honestly I don't. I don't love it. I feel sad every single day. The "language" around me is constant and although I realize to many, this is not a big deal but to me it is and when you hear it all the time it gets to you. I am alone. Very alone. I am part of a secretarial staff that is hugely underpaid and underappreciated. The direct supervisors in my department do appreciate me and that feels good but it only scratches the surface. When I started this job, I did so to get my foot in the door and at first it was great because there was an abundance of work to do. I set forth to get so much accomplished and I did so with fervor. Once it was all done, however things changed for me. No longer did I have something to do but I have to go asking for things to do. It is embarrassing and humiliating to ask people if I can shred their stuff for them. I am not happy. I feel like crying each day and I think that maybe I may be slipping into a depression. I am used to being around a lot of people and interacting with them. Here there are many people but no interaction. I appreciate that I have a good job with good benefits but I don't know how long I can stay here and save my sanity. I am not sure if I will post this or not. I definitely will not put it on Facebook. What to do? I will have to wait out for the job I really want. Pray that it will be sooner rather than later. TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7179902678521137573.post-24539835879170722072016-04-07T09:41:00.002-04:002016-04-07T09:41:42.613-04:00Not Feeling the BestOkay so I have 20 pounds of fat to go. I was able to get on this really cool machine that gives every detail of mass in your body. With the exception of extra skin that could come off with surgery, my muscle and skeletal mass looks good. I have 20 pounds left to go before I am at optimal weight for my height and age. Will I do it? No clue. Will I try? Absolutely. We are doing this challenge at work right now called Everybody Walk Across PA. It is an 8 week walking challenge and we have created teams at work to see just how much we can walk each week. The goal that Penn State Extension encourages teams to accomplish is 10 miles per person per week for 8 weeks. So far in this first week, I have accomplished 9.25 miles and it is only day 4 of the 7-day week. I think the challenge with teams will push me to do more just because I am competitive and whether we win or not makes no real difference. <br />
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On a side note, I have not been feeling my best lately. If you could please pray that my doctor and I can figure out what is going on with me that would be greatly appreciated. I have been experiencing chest pains and some other various symptoms. The good news is, my blood tests have all come back okay. I had a stress echo test this week and my heart is in good shape so I don't really know what is going on. I guess it could be stress, although I don't really know what there is to be stressed about. Thanks for the prayers. I know God has me in His hands and He loves when His people are praying for one another. TheNewMehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11818026029001625877noreply@blogger.com0