TheNewMe

 Well I haven’t really felt like myself this week. Depression has seemed to come back; not full-scale, but I guess this past Sunday I found out about a school friend that passed away that was my age and after that my mood kind of went down I’m not sure if that’s what happened but that’s the only thing I can figure that happened so I haven’t been on my new schedule of high and getting things done since then. I’m not sure how to really describe it other than to say that I have had no motivation this week at all and it kind of worries me because I was doing so good and now all the sudden I’m not and I’m not sure what to do about it. Today I have felt kind of headachy and I just don’t feel good and I snapped at somebody for no reason and I’ve gotten basically nothing done. I’m not sure how to get myself back to how I was last week but I will call my therapist tomorrow and see if I can figure out what I need to do right now I’m gonna go take some medicine and go to sleep I think even though

So I came across some goals that I wrote down at the beginning of 2020 and here is how I did: 1. More time with God.  - Rocking this one I think. I have definitely brought my perspective back to being more about Him and what He is about. I still have a long way to go but directionally getting there. 2. Jamie and Robin settled medically. - Well while we are still working on this one, I am definitely a lot closer to being in a better place. I was able to advocate for myself and was switched from a bad medication to a better one and have seen tremendous results for the better. Jamie is seeing help with therapy that is helping and medication is getting under control. She will always struggle but we are moving forward and that is what counts. 3. Have a family vacation. - Didn't happen due to COVID-19 but we were pretty much quarantined together so does that count?! 4. Plan an awesome anniversary trip. - I planned an awesome weekend but it got cancelled due to COVID so we went to Steve a

So I feel like I have begun a new life of sorts. Some may know and some may not, but I have been on a medical roller coaster for a long time now but for the sake of time I will keep it short with the past few years. I had seizures in 2018 and everything changed. My world was rocked and I lost my independence, my depression spiraled, my body pain increased, migraines progressed, and I struggled to keep up mentally. In that same year, my dad had a stroke and died and I had a full hysterectomy. WOW what a year. I had a wonderful support system but I didn't know how to ask for help or what to even ask for. My co-workers were extremely helpful in assisting me with navigating work and just listening. There were a couple of church friends who prayed for me diligently but most didn't fully know what was going on or the extent of the hardship my family was facing at the time. Our extended family was too far away to do anything but still talked to us as often as they could and prayed as

Nothing much to say today. I have gotten much accomplished today in the way of organization of my home but still have much more to do. I am too tired to get anymore done today so I am going to bed earlier than my normal. Seized the day and looking forward to tomorrow!                                                       Love,                                                            Robin

Okay so today I was productive and was able to make some purchases that will enable me to be a success at home. I was also able to reflect upon past and present mistakes that I have made and still think about making and it reminded me of several thoughts and moments so I thought I would take a minute to post it here. As children, we make mistakes and are chided and disciplined so that we learn from them so that we hopefully do not repeat those mistakes. It may take several times and some of us really never get it but we still are disciplined for it in some way or another. As adults, it is the same thing; whether it is knowing right from wrong or eating one piece of candy or the whole bag (you know who you are) we suffer consequences for those actions. In my health journey, it has been much the same way. One mistake after another hasn't always taught me to do the right thing and the consequences have been severe but that does not mean that it cannot be turned around even at this poi

Well today I did a lot of walking and then Bible study so now I am worn out. This will be a turn in early day. See y'all tomorrow!                  Love,                       Robin